Nothing like being completely worthless all night last night and then waking up at 1:30 AM because A., I was dreaming that I wore jeans to work on a not-casual dress code day that is every day but Friday; and B., I was convinced that I am doing a terrible job as a music therapist. I essentially didn’t sleep for the remainder of the night. Maybe it was the full moon a couple nights ago.
I “taught a class” or “conducted a session” (something I can’t call music therapy because there aren’t goals, apart from providing an engaging experience, in mind for my residents/clients) this afternoon that was one big factor for my unease last night. I “taught,” or rather “shared,” the knowledge I have regarding the difference between violin and fiddle. Ever seen/heard a Chinese erhu? Did you know that it is technically a fiddle?
Another reason I can’t call this particular session/class/what-have-you music therapy is because it’s an open group– anyone can come and go at any time. Does anyone have music therapy groups that are open? This is an honest question; I’d love to know.
And: Has any violinist out there have any suggestions for alleviating back pain that I am almost certain is caused by playing violin? My hard cider and extra strength Tylenol combination isn’t doing the trick.
2 Replies to “Moonlit panic”
I don't know if it helps to hear this, but I felt like a bad music therapist for the first several months of my first job. Now that I've been there for 9 months, the work is coming more naturally to me and I feel confident in it. From what I've seen of your work and heard from other people, you are a very gifted music therapist!
One thing that has been extremely helpful for me lately is having other music therapists observe my groups and give feedback. If you think that would help, I'd be happy to come and participate in one of your groups sometime!
Hearing you say that helps a lot! I still feel pretty uninteresting, but I feel a lot better when I get to see other music therapists. There is another music therapist at my facility, but we hardly ever see each other. How often have you had other music therapists observe you? What a good idea…
Thanks for reading and leaving comments!